Method of Healing: Running

Ah, running. I can truly use this tool for absolutely anything.
I'm sure the 6 year old Lauren who trotted around Elm Park in her first little 1/2 mile "race" had no idea of the impact that running would have in her life.
I used it to justify eating when I was recovering from my mild eating disorders. I then used it to lose baby weight after having children. And now, I use it as therapy - for anything and everything.

Even when running as part of a team, no one can make you run a certain pace - that part is entirely in your own control, and if you perform well, the whole team benefits. How perfect is it that the same cause and effect of this scenario fits right along side true happiness? ;)

As I stated in my previous post, happiness is a job that relies entirely on you. If your husband is in a bad mood or the kids have been acting out, that should not determine your happiness. Of course, those things don't make you feel fantastic, but you do have the power to remove yourself from those situations.

May I introduce you to my friend: running.

I used to let one bad mood in our family overwhelm me. If it was my husband, I would dwell on all the things that we could be doing had be been happier, and if it was the kids, I would allow it to absolutely break me down: hands up, I surrender. Other relatives who bring the drama? I would become encased in it. Bottom line: I didn't feel good about feeling bad. How could other people's emotions have such a strong effect on my emotions? It didn't seem fair. So, in an attempt to work through it, the running shoes were laced up and I headed out the door.

My mind must go a million different directions when I run. I think about all that is bothering me. I ask questions about why they bother me, and also what I can do to fix them. I do ask if it's just me, but also allow myself to feel upset. Some of the time I realize I may have slept poorly, or that its that time again, which may be swaying my emotions out of orbit. Other times I zone in on things that do truly bother me and either work through them myself, or return home with a clear mind and calm manner to address them. Sometimes I dig deep into my past, and run out things that need forgiveness, and have also found that doing this can give meaning to certain emotions or reactions I have today. I run to forgive and forget. As a mom, I run off the temper tantrums - from both my girls and me. I run for my alone time, since it may be the only time I get to myself all day. But I think the most important aspect to running is how I end each one: with positive thoughts, appreciation, and a little self love.

I work through the muck, stomping it out with each pounding stride, and when I start to feel better, I switch my mindset. I focus on the smell of summer, the love of where I live when I run by the ocean, the family I have waiting for me back at home (because even after the worst of days, there is nothing like the sound of "MOMMY'S HOME!!!") - because of all this, I believe running makes me a better person. When I am more calm with those around me, their reactions tend to follow suit. And when they don't, I have a clear conscious knowing that I have done my part. I have taken a stride towards making calmness habitual. I feel good about that, and only I am in control of it all. It may be a small piece of the happiness pie, but it's delicious.

Running has played a huge role thus far in my journey for pure happiness. I am hoping to one day just naturally respond with clear-minded reactions, have constant gratitude for all I have, and above all - love myself entirely. But as I work to get closer and closer to that day, there's nothing a good run won't fix in the meantime ;)